It's weird.. being back. I knew it was going to be even though I know it's right where God wants me. I'm so thankful that God has given me this week to rest, but honestly, it's been hard to rest. I miss the mountains. I miss the Montanans. I miss the Hasenyagers. I miss serving OC. It's been hard to accept the fact that I'm not there anymore, at least for right now. But God continues to be faithful, instructing, and loving in the midst of this strange place I'm in.
Last Thursday night Andrew, my brother, invited me to run around Sunnyvale's track. My gratitude towards him is so great! I needed to get out of the house. I wanted to be active. I climbed up and down the bleachers because I simply wanted to hike a mountain and that was the closest thing I could find in Sunnyvale, TX. We went at sunset and one of the coolest things about Texas is that she's flat, making the sky huge, which makes for some pretty sunsets. As I paused to watch the sky change, I was so arrogant to think that it wasn't as great as a Montanan sunset, that what it really needed was a few mountains on either side and maybe some clouds.
Arrogance is what I will struggle with the most here in Texas. At least for the next few weeks.
But God so calmly and firmly reminded me to let Him be the Creator. To let Him make the decisions.. to let Him mold.. creation, this next semester, this next year, every little and big part of my life. That really started to hit home last night. I've been up the past few nights working on my journal/scrapbook for this summer and a collage of sorts, basically creating things out the wahzoo (it's A LOT of fun and makes me want to be an art major). I asked myself what I would think, feel, or do if someone came into my room, took a look at what I was doing, and out right said, "It needs more.. it doesn't look good that way." Anger. Hurt. Frustration. Those emotions would flood into me and probably flow right out onto whoever said it. So.. how do I think Father felt when I said those same things to Him? Not that He's destroyed by my comments--He's far greater and will not be affected by anything I do. Oh, how I love Him for that! But He's a just God and I wronged Him when I said those things.
Tomorrow I drive to College Station--that will be weird. I'll be further away from Montana. I'll have to follow through on decisions tomorrow. The AC is out at the JKL House, so that'll be interesting. Please pray for me.. for gentle words and that Father would reveal to me what is real and what isn't, what's from Him and what isn't. Pray unity over Kelley, Lauren and I--that we'll listen and be patient with each other; that'll we'll love and serve one another so much more than last year.
Friday and Saturday is the BSM's Leadership Retreat--pray for us, please. Cole and I will talk about what direction our Bible study should go in this semester. The other Upperclassmen Journey Leaders will have to figure out what they'll study this semester as well. Pray for the new ministries that are starting and the students who are new to leading. Pray for these next few weeks--Gig' Em Week and the first two weeks of classes--that seeds will be planted, we'll water diligently, but Father would provide the growth in people.
I cannot thank you enough for the prayer you've granted to me, my team, OC, and Montana this summer. God has worked is marvelous ways and He still is! The next few months will be exciting--in College Station, in Montana, right where you're at. I urge you, don't miss out on what the Lord God is doing around you!
Well, it's been a great summer. Thanks again for reading and praying. If anything exciting happens, I'll let you know. But for now.. I'll see ya later.
Texas Sunset
"Before the mountains were brought forth, or ever you had formed the earth and the world, from everlasting to everlasting you are God."
-Psalm 90:2
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